Tues May 28th 2013

7.30 a.m.

Rain… I don’t mind….

After a couple of days of beautiful sunshine, the rain is rap, rap, rapping against the pane of the window again. It’s grey, a bit dark, but somehow not gloomy. In a way it seems a shame – have a friend visiting today who was keen to go for a long walk in the sunshine, but I quite like the idea of getting a brolly out and going for a ramble in the rain. Enjoyed editing photos yesterday, getting to know about luminosity, contrast, exposure. I’m far from being anywhere near knowledgeable, but taking baby steps is the best option I think, for someone starting out in a new area of understanding.

Must get on with that monologue! Need to make sure I’m refreshed and confident on the day – I’m sure it’ll all be fine, whatever happens, but it’s good practice to make sure you’re well prepared and give yourself the best possible chance as the odds are truly against me on this one. Still, I believe in my ability to learn, and if nothing else, it’ll be interesting to see how I hold up in this quite challenging scenario.

Dreams. Hmm. I slept like a log last night and don’t seem to have any recollection of any of them. Not at the moment, anyway. It was an exhausting weekend, in a way. Fun weekend, but tiring. Lots of socialising, although I find hanging out with Billy and Tylor is very laid back and always fun and love hanging out with people in general, just in a bit of a moany mood I think. I find myself being concerned for Boris at the moment, more than anyone else. He seems to be fundamentally unhappy with his situation, somehow, and I know it’s so difficult to pull yourself up when you’re in that kind of headspace. You feel like you’re completely closed in and you can’t make the changes that you want to make both within yourself, and in the more material sense. That said, where there’s a will, there’s a way, and I’m sure he’ll find his answers soon.

Ate far too much this weekend, but then again, nothing wrong with a bit of self – indulgence every now and again. I say that to convince myself; I’ve been feeling so rubbish about my weight / body fat it’s stupid. Seriously considering some kind of hypnotherapy to help deal with it – I know it’s so stupid to be so bothered about it when I know, completely without question, that it’s a futile consideration.

Must text my friend to find out when she’s going to arrive today. Funny when people are going to show up at your place and don’t let you know when to actually expect them. Oh well. Perhaps I do it too, when you’re travelling it can all seem a bit hectic and it’s difficult to know what to do and you end up being a bit less polite than you would normally be. That’s my theory, anyway.

Mornings are amazing at the moment. I’m so comfy in bed it’s wonderful. Lucky me. Still, I must get back into the super – duper productive groove – I’ve fallen behind a bit on it, and while rest is good, and the subconscious needs the time to formulate it’s weird and wonderful ideas, there does come a point where a kick start is needed. I think I’ve reached that point. Still, it’s all good. It’ll all happen. I’m sure.

So. On with the day. Super day. Yeah!


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