There are lots of things I would like to write about. The movie I saw last night. How lucky I feel to have wonderful friends. My quest to understand my family. The overwhelming love I feel in my relationship. The overwhelming confusion I feel in my relationship. Euphoria. Pain. Being human. Being alive. The wonder of being alive.
When I stop to consider all of the things that swill around in my very regularly sized brain every day, I’m boggled by the sheer volume of stimuli the mind processes in every second that we are conscious. I am becoming more and more grateful for my consciousness every day. You can never be bored! If you are open to life and notice all of the small details, there are infinite experiences available and if you allow yourself to take it all in, drink it and let the juices flow freely around your being and mix with everything that is there already, something new will be created inside. Maybe it will be so small that you won’t even realise that you have just created it and it now exists, but it will continue to live and affect, in some tiny way, the way that you process the world from that point on. Isn’t that amazing? That there is so much to experience, all with the potential to affect you for the rest of your days in a way that you may not even acknowledge or remember? It’s both amazing and bizarre and really quite scary – how much do we really understand about ourselves and why we see things the way we do?
I don’t understand very much at all, really. I am still working very hard to understand myself, let alone other people, the universe, why we’re here, the hidden meanings behind everything. One thing I have worked out though, is that if I write things out, and let my mind meander freely and my fingers simply act as mechanical tools to get the thoughts out onto a page, or a word document, or even a post on Facebook, a vague perception around one of these weighty matters can become Something. Not necessarily Something Of Great Importance, but Something that, in some small way, helps me to understand better. Not necessarily understand more correctly, but to understand better. I like that feeling. Of knowing that you have made some small step towards understanding and that you are alive and learning and evolving at every moment. I am Ordinary. And I am very Idealistic. So this blog is really An Ordinary Idealist sharing the journey of trying to understand better. Perhaps there will be things in here that inspire thought, agreement, disagreement, or laughter, maybe even a yawn because I definitely have a tendency to use too many words to get something across. I’m hoping that as I write more, this will also improve, and that the mere act of writing regularly, about whatever it feels right to write about that day will help me to evolve as a writer too. Fingers crossed.
Thanks for reading.
An Ordinary Idealist.